time to vent

LA traffic sucks. Even when there is no traffic during the holidays there is too many morons driving around thinking that no one else is on the road. By the way, thats an everyday occurrence. I want to give a big middle finger to the asshole that threw the banana on my car that I can't get off. You are an idiot. Was that funny to you or are you just that inconsiderate, that's the only real question I have for you jerk.

Work. Too much to do, no time and everyone puts the pressure of leading on me whether they do it intentionally or not. If you are going to put me in that position you are going to get it my way, not your way with me doing the work. You know what really sucks... all this work is clouding my mind. I mean I'm always in a stressful state of mind. I don't take care of the things that I need to take care of because I just flat out don't want to. It clouds my emotions and feelings. All this work takes precedence over people and relationships and myself. Thats not fair! I don't feel like myself...

Relationships. How is it that everybody I know is in a relationship? Everyone. Did I miss the boat or something? People keeping asking me whats up with me? WTF. I don't know, I'm a loser, sorry. I guess I wasted my youth and I will never be happy now. I'll have to settle for someone when I'd rather have more. You're lucky, I'm a doochbag.

You would think that venting would help but all it does is make me sad. Well on the bright side at least I have work to dominate my mind for the rest of my pathetic existence, right?!?!?

I don't know how much longer I can keep going at this rate, living like this and living day to day. I need some vision in the future to tell me this is all worth it.