intermission

Rather than giving the next installment in the ladder theory. I'd like to give a nice break and mention 2 unexpected compliments I received in the last couple days.

One of them relayed through a friend to me... To give a little background, I'm not supposed to know this which makes it all the more of juicy gossip. Now I have alot of insider information here and although it is quite flattering it's nice just to here it. In a drunken, compromised moment a young lady expressed to my friend how attractive I am to her; 'He's so fuckin'hot...' Haven't been called hot in a very long time so that was pretty cool. Everyone gets cute. I think cute is overused. We need to be more descriptive and not so lazy when we describe people.

Second was random. I saw a friend from my MBA program who graduated a semester year ahead of in the parking lot as I was coming into the gym. We were talking about what we were doing presently. And I told her I'm doing what I've been doing. She just laughed at me and said, "Yeah... you're lucky that you're super-smart" I don't even know what that means, but thanks. It definitely made my day.

Deconstructing the Woman's Pie Chart

It was previously thought that the pie chart was fundamental. New advances in Ladder Theory have brought us to a more complete understanding. We have made new advances in the inner structure of the woman's rating system and now present it here.

First let's look at the rating system in Classical Ladder Theory



Now this is a fairly accurate description, and is essentially accurate. It misses a number of fine points. By defining the 40% block as "looks" the theory had originally assumed that looks were influenced by factor's other than just physical attraction. For example, a guy who is a complete asshole to a woman seems to somehow look better to them. (American women and ones with low maturity levels, haha) It soon became apparent from peer review that the term looks was inappropriate and has been replaced by the more accurate "attraction". The new chart then looks like this.



Previously it had been assumed that looks was fundamental. That is, that it could not be broken down any further, and that a score was assigned based on whatever biological principles made women attracted to men. Through extensive research we have been able to discern the inner structure of attraction. A chart will illustrate a very close approximation of the inner structure of attraction for the female. Commentary to follow.



Physical Attraction/Looks - This is still a big factor in attraction. This is self-explanatory.

Competition - I almost titled this section disinterest. The two are closely related. We can only pursue what runs away from us. A man who is devoted to something else besides the woman is automatically more attractive. Anyone who has ever listened to a girl complain about how her boyfriend-ran-off-with-a-slut or how her boyfriend-is-really-not-dumb-he's-just-streetsmart-and-he- has-to-sell-weed-to-support-his-baby's-mama or he's-not-emotionally-available-that's-why-I-like-talk-to-you-until-it's-time-to-go-with him while he himself is sitting right there and would like nothing better than to be with her but of course is sitting solidly on the friends ladder knows this intuitively. Ultimately, almost all guys learn this truth for themselves: The best way to never score with a woman is to show TOO MUCH interest in her.

Women seem to especially like it if you are more devoted to your bad music, biker gang, forearm tattoo or marijuana. This isn't just about devotion but showing interest in something like a career, family, cars, something that shows you got some passion and a little bit of intrigue to you. These all seem to work wonders.

Novelty - Let's face it, if you're like every other guy who works a normal job and tries to live a good life, you're probably like just about every other guy. Chicks don't dig this, and why would they? Who wants someone who is just like everyone else? Something different is more attractive. Like someone who does not have to work during the day like most people because they have an interesting job. Or like someone who has cool hair, or an special talent like sports or music or whatever.... Different is good.

De constructing money/power
"Power is a great aphrodisiac" - Notorious Asshole and War Criminal Henry Kissinger
"A woman's test is material. A man's test is a woman...if a man could fuck in a cardboard box, he wouldn't buy a house." - Rabbi Dave Chappelle

It was previously assumed that money was a fundamental unit of attraction to a woman. Further investigation has revealed a better understanding of this very important piece of the woman's rating system. The piece which was formerly labeled money has been replaced by a money/power paradigm. The two are almost always intertwined in a way that makes them hard to distinguish, so I don't think it productive to make a chart of how they breakdown exactly. One almost always follows the other in any case.

What is important to know about the money/power piece is that previously it was thought of as static. Now we know that the money/power piece of attraction displays time-variance. That is, the amount of money needed to get maximal "points" in the money category varies according to the age of the woman. When a woman is younger her perspective is different as to what makes a lot of money. As she gets older the amount of money necessary for full points increases.

For a girl of 16 full points for money might be obtained by having access to a car and clothes money. When she is in her early college years, a nicer car and enough money to trips on the weekend and buy some nice things is sufficient. As she advances into her twenties what we consider to be the normal money chart will begin to manifest itself -- that is, she'll want the richest man she can get.

At no point that we can discern does money ever not become a factor. Take any guy. Take a woman that has that guy. In no circumstance that is known would she not rather have a guy just like that, but with more money. Actually, maybe in one circumstance -- when the guy has enough money to buy her basically everything she wants. This is self-evident, I should think.

The Rating system for Women

So the breakdown looks like:

Money and Power: 50%

Attraction: 40%

Things Women Say They Care About But Do Not: 10%
(this includes intelligence, sense of humor, honesty, sensitivity etc. )

As to the first point, that of money. Well most guys know that women dig guys with money. Would Donald Trump be dating models if he wasn't rich? That question is rhetorical. Now I don't even believe this is wrong, I think it is just nature. But I also think women who are this way (and it is almost all of you) should be honest and admit that they are basically looking to be taken care of. It's not a negative thing it's actually very primal. I learned through an anthropology class that apes and the our ancestors go after alpha males, or what are consider caretakers. The biggest and strongest, the smartest and most powerful, the most fertile and healthy. This is what ape women wanted back then. Because they were procreating on instinct, but it still applies today. Women want their children and family taken care of first and foremost.

Most women read this and say something like, "Well I'm not the average woman because..blah...blah...not true...blah blah...my boyfriend/lover/husband/masseuse was poor...blah...blah."

If you thought something like this you are very likely the average woman.

Looks are not to be discounted. I see many girls revert to about a seventh grade emotional level when they see some guy at the club, or some guy from a crappy movie. I think everyone has seen this phenomena, and it seems to have become an alarming trend in women of increasing age.

The attraction category is broken down further in the next section. This is a change from previous versions of the ladder theory that included looks here instead of attraction. I feel this is a more accurate depiction, as evidenced by experiment and peer review.

The last 10% was my effort to give women the benefit of the doubt. A common question men ask of women is "Tell me what you want in a man?", which is like asking how many guys she's slept with, an invitation to be lied to. Because she'll almost invariably answer with some combination of

* sense of humor
* intelligence
* sensitivity
* emotional stability

As far as I can tell this is mostly rubbish. But in an effort to be fair I have included this, since there seem to be a few rare cases of this. Just none that I have ever seen.

Another thing to watch out for is the code words women use. Here is a translation guide for dealing with women.

Says: I want a man who is motivated and has goals.
Means: I want a rich man

Says: I want a man who knows how to treat a woman.
Means: I want a man who knows what nice things are.

Says: He's from a really good family.
Means: He's from a stable background with some money.

I'm sure you get the point. Let's move on.

My Modified Ladder Theory

This is so well constructed and summarizes so many different theories, etc... That I had to post this. Many props to www.intellectualwhores.com, Neil Straus, and all the other people in the reality of relationships. When you're going through this, be honest with yourself. This is reality. In italics will be my additional comments.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The ladder theory is a theory of adult male/female interaction. It has its basis in many years of sociological field testing. it was first conceptualized in 1994 in Exeter, CA. My acknowledgments to Jared Whitson for his role in formalizing the theory. Not only that, but it also is proven through our biology and evolution from apes.

Foundations of Ladder Theory

Sally: We are just going to be friends, OK?
Harry: Great, friends. It's the best thing...You realize, of course, that we can never be friends.
Sally: Why not?
Harry: What I'm saying is - and this is not a come-on in any way, shape, or form - is that men and women can't be friends, because thethe desire and attraction for more is there. .
Sally: That's not true. I have a number of men friends and there is its strictly platonic.
Harry: No, you don't.
Sally: Yes, I do.
Harry: No, you don't.
Sally: Yes, I do.
Harry: You only think you do.
Sally: You're saying I'm having sex with these men without my knowledge? OR that I'm dating these guys without my knowledge?
Harry: No, what I'm saying is they all want to have sex with you. OR want to date you.
Sally: They do not.
Harry: Do too.
Sally: They do not.
Harry: Do too.
Sally: How do you know?
Harry: Because no man can be friends with a woman that he finds attractive. He always wants more. And if he says he doesn't to his friends or anyone else that's because he's lying. He's coming up with a justified reason for how he can reject her before she rejects him. For instance, my reason for not dating Aishwarya Rai is because she is older than me and she's a celebrity and there's no way I can deal with that chaos. In reality, if she showed and asked me out I would go out with her without even questioning why she's asking a fool like me.
Harry: So the friendship is ultimately doomed, and that is the end of the story.


Every time you meet someone you give them a quick mental rating. Just how this is done is based on your sex, like so:

I personally use the area code system.





One quick thing to add here. the 30% related to how fast she'll sleep with me is not what every guy thinks. That 30% consists if there is a chemistry, is she responsive to me, is she sexy, and so and so on

It should be noted that this is not an entirely conscious process. To make it clear here's an illustrative example of what really happens:

* Amol meets Shipra
* Then Amol meets Mona

Now the ladder theory description goes like this:

1. Amol meets Shipra
2. Amol sizes her up based on the above criterion
3. Amol puts her on the ladder
4. Amol meets Mona
5. Amol sizes her up based on the above criterion
6. Amol puts her on the ladder above Shipra


You can recognize this has gone on because Amol says " I'd like to Shipra, but not as much as I like Mona"

I think that everyone has heard this or something like it enough times for us to accept it as axiomatic and move on. You might be thinking, " Well what about Shipra and Mona?" We'll get to them next.

More coming tomorrow. It might sound oversimplified right now but trust me it gets way more in depth than you think.

not tonite... TBC

sorry all i got tonite is a video.



In this farewell,
There’s no blood,
There’s no alibi.
'Cause I’ve drawn regret,
From the truth,
Of a thousand lies.

So let mercy come,
And wash away…

What I’ve Done.
I’ll face myself,
To cross out what I’ve become.
Erase myself,
And let go of what I've done.

Put to rest,
What you thought of me.
While I clean this slate,
With the hands,
Of uncertainty.

[What I've Done lyrics on http://www.metrolyrics.com]

So let mercy come,
And wash away…

What I’ve Done.
I’ll face myself,
To cross out what I’ve become.
Erase myself,
And let go of what I've done.

For What I’ve Done

I start again,
And whatever pain may come.
Today this ends,
I’m forgiving what I’ve done.
I’ll face myself,
To cross out what I’ve become.
Erase myself,
And let go of what I’ve done.
What I’ve done.

Forgiving What I’ve Done.

The guise of life

The guise of life is that everything works out the way we think it will in our heads. We put together visions in our head of how things will go and what we expect. Things never seem to work out the way they're supposed and we just have to deal. This isn't new but I just wanted to twist it and talk about it with regards to relationships.

Of all the people I know, I would say the overwhelming majority end up with people they probably thought they would never end up with. It's pretty remarkable but even those people that on paper who seem perfect for you, you're just not into. I know that feeling.

I'm sorry my mind is so foggy right I'm in need of a few hours sleep before my crazy day starts tomm. I'll finish this later.

What will they think of next?

Paan-flavoured condoms come out tops in India

NEW DELHI (Reuters) - An Indian firm has launched a paan-flavoured condom designed to evoke the pungent taste of the betel nut and tobacco concoction chewed and then spat out by millions of South Asians, newspapers reported on Tuesday.

Hindustan Latex Ltd. is targeting the new condom range at prostitutes, who are among the most vulnerable to sexually transmitted diseases such as AIDS, the Hindustan Times reported.

The company ran taste tests with sex workers, including prototypes with chocolate, banana and strawberry flavours, but the paan flavour came out tops.

"The community loved it as most of the sex workers chew paan," Sanjeev Gaikwad was quoted as saying at the launch in Mumbai. Gaikwad is a director at Family Health International, a public health organisation that helped develop the condom.

Paan is a mildly intoxicating preparation wrapped in a leaf, usually containing tobacco, betel nut and flavourings, and is hugely popular across South Asia. It is chewed to a mouth-staining red pulp before being spat out.

The condoms will at first be made available only to prostitutes, but will we launched to the general public in a few months, the newspaper said.

Grand Canyon Hike

So me and my best friend are going to go Man vs. Wild and take on the South Rime of the Grand Canyon next Spring. Something like this itinerary but it's going to be way more simple. We're going to take on the wild like that guy on Man vs. Wild who's pretty much MacGiver on Human Growth Hormones. Just watching that show we want to try it out on own. Yeah that's how fools end up on helicopter rescues but between us we can do it I know. It's a little more adventuresome than I usually am but you have to step out of your comfort zone sometimes and do something that will be something you'll have for the rest of your life that noone could take from you.

It's like in Transformers when the hero tells the girl, 50 years from now do you want to look back and regret that you didn't get in the car with me? To have the opportunity to do something that could alter your life forever... Those moments come few and far between. I'm making no sense unless you've seen the movie and it makes even less sense if you haven't camped out in the wild.



This hike is our south rim counterpart to The Wonders of the Grand Canyon. Desert oases and spectacular vistas await your arrival on the south rim. Geologic history and cultural history will be encountered on this hike; this trail was used by copper miners in the late nineteenth century and was also used by horse thieves to move their loot across the canyon. Expect on-trail hiking over steep terrain.

Itinerary

Day 1: Our hike begins on the South Kaibab Trail, a deservedly popular route that offers spectacular views both up and down the Canyon. It’s seven miles of well-maintained trail to the Bright Angel Campground, our destination and camp for the first two nights. This campground is one of the most charming in the Park, as it’s situated at the bottom of the Canyon near the Colorado River and adjacent to Bright Angel Creek. Campsites are shaded by tall, spreading cottonwoods, piped drinking water is available, and nearby Phantom Ranch offers a snack bar, cold beer, the best lemonade in the Canyon, and ranger-led evening interpretive programs.

Day 2: This is a great basecamp for a layover day and a chance to relax and absorb the magic of the Canyon. Remember your swimsuit for a soak in the cool waters of Bright Angel Creek, catch up on that book you’ve been wanting to read, spend quality time with your family exploring the area, or join your guide for day hikes up the North Kaibab or Clear Creek Trails – the choice is yours.

Day 3: After a hearty breakfast we’ll pack up and make an early departure to take advantage of the cool hiking hours of the morning. Following the Bright Angel Trail along the Colorado we’ll arrive at Garden Creek. From here we’ll follow Garden Creek upstream past its junction with Pipe Creek to Indian Garden – a spring site that watered seasonal Havasupai garden plots for centuries. From here it’s a short distance to our camp for the night - Indian Garden Campground, another enchanting camp with shade and water.

Day 4: A casual morning and delicious breakfast will precede a beautiful hike out as we continue our ascent to the rim via Garden Creek and the Bright Angel Trail. It’s 4 ½ miles from camp to the parking lot and a beautiful drive back to Flagstaff for an anxiously anticipated shower, dinner, and bed.



What's Included?

* Every trip includes a professional, medically trained, friendly wilderness guide.
* All meals are included from trail food (lunch) and dinner the first day through breakfast and trail food the last day.
* All associated park entrance fees are included.
* We provide travel support in determining the best and most affordable travel services available to you.
* You will receive a Lifetime Family Membership entitling you to a lifetime discount of 10% off any trip after your first one!

Where do we Meet?

We will meet you at an agreed upon location the night before the trip begins, where we will discuss the details of the upcoming adventure. Usually this meeting takes place in Flagstaff, Arizona.

dating older chicks

I've always been attracted to and have drawn attraction for older women. I know it's my demeanor and how I act in group settings that draws them to me. it's their mystery and and sophistication that attracts me to them. There's a stigma in the Indian culture with older women and younger men. More so for the women but if they accept it it can pretty amazing. So far I don't think I've been able to successfully accept that age difference with anyone and I haven't met a woman who has either. Sometimes I wonder if I pursue these women out of need to validate myself. I wonder if it means more to them to feel attractive in the eyes of a younger man of quality.

time to promote a good cause

This important so I'm posting this here for those who will actually donate money to a good cause. A friend of mine is walking the entire 40K so make sure you at least read this. And go to the link below.


”Did you know that every three minutes, another woman in the United States is diagnosed with breast cancer? I didn't, and I was shocked to learn how prevalent this horrible disease has become in this country.

I am eager to get started with my fundraising and I need your support! I have pledged to raise money for the Avon Walk for Breast Cancer as part of my participation in the walk. Your contribution will help to support medical research into the possible causes of and cure for breast cancer, education and early detection programs, and clinical care and support services for women with breast cancer in communities across the country. There is a special focus on helping medically underserved women, the poor, minorities, the elderly, or those with inadequate health insurance. And much of the money granted by the Foundation goes back to the communities where it was raised, supporting everything from local grassroots programs to national organizations.

It is faster and easier than ever to support this great cause - you can make a donation online by simply clicking on the link at the bottom of this message. Whatever you can give will help! I truly appreciate your support and will keep you posted on my progress.

Thank you for your support; you really do make a difference.”

Click here to visit my personal page.
If the text above does not appear as a clickable link, you can visit the web address:
http://info.avonfoundation.org/site/TR?px=3463334&pg=personal&fr_id=1284&et=w7OUItzr4BeVwleVBAXruw..&s_tafId=154262

Some email systems may send your response to the Avon Foundation, not to your walker/donor when you push "reply". Before "sending", please confirm that your message is addressed to your intended recipient (above). If info@avonfoundation.org appears as a recipient, please delete and add the correct recipient email.

time to self gloss

motivation

Motivation has been my major obstacle in anything I've done in life. I should say anything I haven't done in life. For whatever the reason is, I talk myself out of doing things and make excuses that allow me to live with not completing a task. Since I've pinpointed this, and I also know that I can do anything IF I WANT TO. I don't want to sound extremely arrogant but I know have ability to do anything I want to. You have to feel powerful inside before others will believe you are.

It ties in with my next thought. You screw up a few times and people thing that's who you are. I was constantly criticized by an exgirlfriend who saw any little thing that I did as a said it was who I am with major character flaws. It really gets drilled home that way and I didn't know what to do for the longest time. I tried to change, I tried to just live with it albeit uneasily. But now I'm content with improving my life on my terms. If I'm not motivated to do somethign I ask myself, "Is it worth it?, Do you need to do this?, What will I learn?"

The future

JAINA 2007... www.jaina.org Really cute, really funny, and really touching

Confusius says...

In high school I studied Confucius in-depth and I always was enamored by his philosophy. So here are some his greatest quotes directed to some people I know.

X - When you see a man of worth, think of how you may emulate him.
When you see one who is unworthy, examine yourself.

Me - To go too far is as bad as to fall short.

Himala - Forget injuries, never forget kindnesses.

My little brother - Have no friends not equal to yourself.

Me, again - The superior man is satisfied and composed; the mean man is
always full of distress.

The rest of you - Do not wish for quick results, nor look for small advantages.
If you seek quick results, you will not reach the ultimate
goal. If you are led astray by small advantages, you will
never accomplish great things.

dwayne wade... baby jordan

STAND UP 8.
FALL 7 TIMES.

--------------------------------------------

I love that commercial. And I called it like I call many things. I knew d-wade was going to win a championship because he had that something jordan in him.



In this farewell
There’s no blood
There’s no alibi
‘Cause I’ve drawn regret
From the truth
Of a thousand lies

[Pre-Chorus]
So let mercy come
And wash away
What I’ve done

[Chorus]
I'll face myself
To cross out what I’ve become
Erase myself
And let go of what I’ve done

Put to rest
What you thought of me
Well I cleaned this slate
With the hands
Of uncertainty

So let mercy come
And wash away
What I’ve done

[Chorus]
I’ll face myself
To cross out what I’ve become
Erase myself
And let go of what I’ve done

For what I’ve done
I start again
And whatever pain may come
Today this ends
I’m forgiving what I’ve done

[Chorus]
I’ll face myself
To cross out what I’ve become
Erase myself
And let go of what I’ve done

What I’ve done
Forgiving what I’ve done

What I've Done

God has always sent me signs, putting strange things right in front of me so I can see for myself what it is that I'm supposed to aware of. Consequently those things change me. After all that's happened I wonder if interpreted those things right.

Today I was insulted beyond my high capacity for insults. My ex-girlfriend went nuclear on me and let it rain down until there was silence to make sure nothing could survive. Nothing did.... In a moment's notice, I lost a lot of respect for her. For what it's worth I really didn't have it in me to say much back. What's the point, now? Karma can be a bitch. The line was clearly drawn and the past 1 year of my life is history. No sense in looking back anymore to draw anything positive from it. At this point I wish I could go back to the beginning and change it all.

I don't think I'm worse off than I was a year ago, but things have changed. It seems like none of it was real. I put up with so much unnecessary bullshit for my own unexplainable reasons.

No I'm no Einstein, and I'm not California Senator Diane Feinstein... But I do know this .. The Ms. Mehta I knew doesn't exist, not sure if she ever did.

I'm finally free.

http://www.theculturalconnect.com/new/2007/06/24/young-jains-of-america-desi/

continued

Different parts of your personality come out and now that's how people perceive you. People do their best to show off the parts of their personality to show the parts that they want people to see in them. I'm not sure if I've blogged on this topic already. But if people see you as a calming influence then that's what you become. It works another way too. People can see the parts of you that you're not so comfortable with and then that's what you are.

my calming influence

I have some new friends. They tell me that I have a calming influence, its my aura... I had to laugh. I don't think a lot of people would agree with that, my family (mom, dad, brother... my ex-girlfriend, my best friends and my business partners... My new theory:

People's personality change. Well, the way people perceive you can change. Maybe its me, I haven't fully figured it out yet. You know what its too late I need to finish this though tomorrow. But one thing is for sure,I know impressions change of how people think of you and that will change again. GOOD NITE NOW!!