bad days

You ever have a bad day that wasn't anything out of the ordinary, but seemed to add up into a culmination of events? And you look back and you start pondering your own existence. What choices you made leading up where you are in life - how you fucked up?

I realize the life that I've chosen isn't typical and that my successes and failures are bigger and more passionate than others. I put my entire self into the projects I work on and I have more than just time and effort tied to them. I have hopes and aspirations.

If I would've taken the corporate route where would my life be at right now. It's a sick fascination to think what if this would have happened or what if I chose this girl instead of that one, where would things have gone?

My mom quoted scriptures from The Gita today and told me in Hindi, don't worry about the outcome, keep working and acting in your true nature. The thing is, I've been grinding for a very long time it feels like and it hasn't gotten me to where I'm supposed to be at. So what now? Hope tommorrow isn't another bad day...