Partying. Dinners, brunch in the Long Beach Harbor. Watching movies, bullshitting, goofing off. Playing Taboo and Crainium. Too bad I got work because thats messing up this long weekend. Can't wait until NYE. More to come later on this fantastic weekend that put me behind in work in so many ways.... But it was worth it.
LA traffic sucks. Even when there is no traffic during the holidays there is too many morons driving around thinking that no one else is on the road. By the way, thats an everyday occurrence. I want to give a big middle finger to the asshole that threw the banana on my car that I can't get off. You are an idiot. Was that funny to you or are you just that inconsiderate, that's the only real question I have for you jerk.
Work. Too much to do, no time and everyone puts the pressure of leading on me whether they do it intentionally or not. If you are going to put me in that position you are going to get it my way, not your way with me doing the work. You know what really sucks... all this work is clouding my mind. I mean I'm always in a stressful state of mind. I don't take care of the things that I need to take care of because I just flat out don't want to. It clouds my emotions and feelings. All this work takes precedence over people and relationships and myself. Thats not fair! I don't feel like myself...
Relationships. How is it that everybody I know is in a relationship? Everyone. Did I miss the boat or something? People keeping asking me whats up with me? WTF. I don't know, I'm a loser, sorry. I guess I wasted my youth and I will never be happy now. I'll have to settle for someone when I'd rather have more. You're lucky, I'm a doochbag.
You would think that venting would help but all it does is make me sad. Well on the bright side at least I have work to dominate my mind for the rest of my pathetic existence, right?!?!?
I don't know how much longer I can keep going at this rate, living like this and living day to day. I need some vision in the future to tell me this is all worth it.
Between my brother, my dad, and myself, I can't tell you how much stuff was lost in a 48 hour period. I worked so hard this weekend, we all did. We fought with each other. There's one thing that is glaring to me. My dad has a huge learning curve to get through to understand how small business gets done. Its not like corporate America and you can't waste time on little details, you have to move thorugh things quickly because you'll never get through it. eh.. I'm trying to push him through it buts extremely frustrating. I'm exhausted...
First of all, before I get to the actual news I have to talk about my day. I woke up feeling completely horrible. I missed my alarm and was 2 hours late to work. I thought I was just really tired. I realized somewhere along the drive to work that I was sick. And that it feels like the flu. I'm still hoping its from bad food. I did eat some nachoes of questionable integrity late last night and I'm embarrassed to say that. It was sitting out for more than a few hours with sour cream and guacamole on it. I thought my iron stomach could take it but I'm hoping thats why I got sick. Either way I toughed it out at work and we'll see how it goes tomorrow. I need to sleep soon.
Stupid X-mas party last night. Didn't want to be there, showed up late and got last. Was not informed to wear a tie so looked like a jackass. Listened to people talk about nonsense and miss the suns game even though the bar tv was tantalizingly close. I tried to resist temptation knowing that I had the game on the DVR at home. Unfortunately the outcome was something I should have just known ahead of time to avoid wasting 2 hours. Good game though, just only needed to watch the last 3 minutes.
So I radically changed my look. The fro is gone. I'm sporting some hybrid fohawk thing. I still don't know how I feel because I changed my identity now. People are going to freak out. The way I see it, I look good either way I just want to know which way would make me look better. This is different for me and I feel like I'm doing the mainstream thing but we will see how it feels when people see it. The thing is if I had a girlfriend or something I would just let her choose my hair. But since I don't, I have to make these tough decisions on my own. I just went to my stylist and told him hey, do whatever you want. And thats what he did.
I just got a guy $1.5 million from a business plan I wrote. Yay? or Hey!! I don't think I'll ever be happy with how much I'm compensated.
Shes got the whole package and she even writes her own songs. In 10 years she will be the next Tyra after Tyra becomes the next Ophra.
When people get busy they seem to ignore people and get irritated by people and they're all grumpy, present company NOT excluded. I do it just like everyone else. Anyways, goin to sleep hope I wake up in the morning. I had an amazing drive through the Angeles National Forest to my client's site. I really wanted to stop and take pictures if I had my 35mm SLR. We drove through these winding canyons and I got to see some of the destruction that some of the fires did. I would have taken the sweetest pictures of these burnt up treats that didn't make it to the top and would have looked siiick in black and white. Oh well...
As the days fly by and years add up we continue to evolve and survive, that includes me too... But you know, sometimes survival leads us to success or happiness and sometimes it just is survival. I've been able to survive by continuing to do things I've never done before. In professional sense, I've always taken on things that I knew nothing about it, faked it, and became successful. Maybe fake is too strong of a word but I definitely didn't know what the hell I was doing a lot of the time and I for sure felt overwhelmed.
Tomorrow, before ths sun comes out I will be on my way to a client's site doing what my firm does, using our methodology, a methodology that I don't fully understand yet and have no practical use of. Yeah, I'll get through it, but I don't want to. When you look to people for encouragement you always hear the same thing. You'll do fine, and yada yada yada. I wish instead of trying to give me encouragement someone could tell me something to get me over the hump. I hate going into work with a bad attitude. So many of us go in bitter because of the strain that work has put on us.
So thats what I long for. Someone telling me things to get me over the hump. I also long for the ability to wake up on time. I hope I wake up on time and I hope I don't screw this up. Rise and shine at 6:3o... Seeing the sun rise is unnatural, unless you've been up all night.
As the days fly by and years add up we continue to evolve and survive, that includes me too... But you know, sometimes survival leads us to success or happiness and sometimes it just is survival. I've been able to survive by continuing to do things I've never done before. In professional sense, I've always taken on things that I knew nothing about it, faked it, and became successful. Maybe fake is too strong of a word but I definitely didn't know what the hell I was doing a lot of the time and I for sure felt overwhelmed.
Tomorrow, before ths sun comes out I will be on my way to a client's site doing what my firm does, using our methodology, a methodology that I don't fully understand yet and have no practical use of. Yeah, I'll get through it, but I don't want to. When you look to people for encouragement you always hear the same thing. You'll do fine, and yada yada yada. I wish instead of trying to give me encouragement someone could tell me something to get me over the hump. I hate going into work with a bad attitude. So many of us go in bitter because of the strain that work has put on us.
So thats what I long for. Someone telling me things to get me over the hump. I also long for the ability to wake up on time. I hope I wake up on time and I hope I don't screw this up.
I was one of the 1.2 million that downloaded the 400 page report and spent a half hour at work thumbing through it. It confirms what I've been saying since 2005, Clemens is on steroids. No one is suppose to get better in their 40s. Michael Jordan was a shell of himself in his forties... The difference is since he is most likely the greatest athlete and competitor in the history of organized sports and also the greatest to play his sport that the Universe has ever seen. But I'm comparing apples to oranges. Let me make all this sports talk relevant to people who don't know or don't care what I'm talking about.
Real quick background: The Mitchell Report was an independent study done by a Senator was nominated for Chief Justice but declined it because of health reasons (hows that credibility for ya) done at the request of Major League Baseball to show the scope of the performance enhancement drug culture in baseball. Over 80 players were named in various levels of usage and of steroids, Human Growth Hormone and other stuff. Many were already speculated. What makes this report pretty amazing is how he got absolutely no cooperation for the Major League Baseball Players Association and only 1 player who was forced to give his testimony that has felony implications if he lies.
So what does this study tell us? Well it tells us that baseball players were cheating because if you aren't cheating you aren't trying. Everyone is looking for an edge. Baseball is a reflection of our society. Look at the lending industry, look at all the reporting fraud done in corporate america, look at MBAs cheating in school... Everyone is striving to be great at any cost.
But this is what I don't get. If someone says to me, if you take this stuff you will go from good to great. If you are great it will take you from great to the greatest of all time. You will make hundreds of millions of dollars. You will probably take 15 years off your life though... Yeah no question. I'll take the years and I'll take 'mediocrity'. Money comes and go but years don't come back. Like 2pac said, 'fuck the money and fame, I'm a simple man'
I'd rather have those years at the end of my life enjoying Grandchildren and hopefully great-grand children and sharing my knowledge and wisdom with others and trying to achieve salvation.
Now I might need a shot of HGH to get me up tomorrow morning but hey I'll take my own performance enhancement drug. Black coffee with 3 sugars/ splendas and doing it the right way...
Girls always tell me how their space heater is the best thing since the magic bullett. And I have to agree that warmth is pretty amazing. This winter I bought one and I love it. There's one thing, I can't scientifically prove it but I think the cold ages, that and guilt. Even here in the West Coast where it its freezing at night and after 11am its perfect, this cold makes me want to curl up in a ball next to the space heater and wait until its warm again.
I've been saying this for more than a year now, its inevitable and its the future and we will going green if we want to or not. I hate it when these things become fads though. When I was at the LA Auto Show every single company has a hybrid. I think hybrids are sweet as hell. But really, I thought about the financial aspect of it all and I came to this realization, unless you have the extra money to spend on a hybrid just to drive a luxury vehicle then you're really not doing much to help the environment. To explain it quickly, you're spending roughly $4K-$12K more for a car that gets not that much better mileage. Like a Chevy Tahoe currently gets 11-13 mpg, and a hybrid gets 17. So what, big deal. I don't think its worth it. If you want to get a hybrid, the only ones that make environmental sense and economical sense is one of the following; Accord, Civic, Camry, Corolla, and Prius. For SUVs I would say Ford Escape. So my dream of a Lexux hybrid is pretty much on hold until they make some major improvements.
Anyways, how I got onto cars I'm not sure. But I still want to open a consulting company focusing strictly on Green startups and existing greenies. And now that I've got a methodology behind what I'm doing maybe I can actually get into this thing before it passes me by... Where does the time go?
No just today but all week. I feel really strange at times. You know there is one thing that I've always wanted to say, but once you say it, its like, people will probably look at me crazy. Its not even coming off crazy, its just when you say something you can't take it back, and when its something that means a lot to you but can't really explain then you better just keep it to yourself so it doesn't lose its impact.
I've been so out of touch with India. Note to self: Get on top of that.
Hi Amit
How are you?I have seen your pics and let me tell you , you look dashing.......a real punjabi Indian!!!!!!!!
I was expecting you this December as it had been 2yr weh u last came and ur trip was due again .
I have left ICICI bank and joined Computer Sciences Corporation in Noida.Its a USA based comapny with head office in Dallas and is into IT sector.
Wat abt you, life,work,study and love...........????????
Love
Your Sis
Tanu
If i just held in everything that could possibly harm somebody's feelings I think my head would explode by next Tuesday. Seriously, I thought about it, Tuesday.... You know, my overactive brain is soooo good at my job but it can hurt people. I in my head I don't think that what I'm saying is hurtful to others, its just how I see it. So I remember in high school I mentioned to a friend that he could do better than his current girlfriend. And this wasn't a mere superficial standpoint, this guy was with the wrong girl entirely and she was not a nice person from all my encounters with her which was 3 days a week for lunch since our sister high school were the only days we had a coed lunch period. Well I went over the top and I said she looked kinda like a goat.... He broke up with her a week later and I felt as guilty as anyone could feel.
Yeah, I'm piece of shit. I took it too far and I didn't could have gotten my point across a lot better. At times I can be so pure with my language and others I can't get the words out right and it comes out so bad and people don't understand me. Now, sometimes that language is completely accurate and my thoughts are hurtful and it puts me in this weird place where I don't know what to think. Am I Darth Vader?
I could go into this whole soliloquy about the whole good/bad, Darth Vader/Anakin Skywalker and how to do the right thing you have to do some things that people interpret as bad but your intentions never changed... but in the end you changed because of those decisions... I don't know wha tto think about things and if my thoughts are concoctions or theyre legitmate psychological responses to the given circumstances. I don't even want to talk about it.
I am a gunslinger by nature. I shoot from the hip and I do it because it needs to be done. I count the shells afterwards. I've gotten wiser and learned how to bite the bullet (see how I tied all those metaphores together?) BUT when I do shoot from the hip or off at the mouth the consequences seem to be much greater. Most people love my style and know me for my good nature.
xxxx said, huh ... okay, interesting...that they would do that...not like them
and anyone who knows you, knows that you only have good intentions in mind ...
i never seems so
Its been 1 year, like I've mentioned several times now. My memory when it comes to that relationship is pretty clear. And recently found out through the most unlikely of ways is that i was the 'rebound relationship'. If I try to explain it to you wouldn't undertand and be board but fallback career is CSI or DA because I can put things together pretty well. My math is really off or I was lied to or something wasn't told to me but I was told that when we first started dating that she had been broken up with this guy for more than a year when we started dating. Well from what I gather, which could be entirely wrong, she was still with him 6 months before we even met. Which means during that time theres the break up the get back together the break up and getting over the person.
Suddenly, it all seems so clear. I was just a rebound guy. That's why things moved so quickly and thats why it got so serious so fast. I could've been anybody. That relationship had a time bomb on it from the beginning and I didn't even know it. Now I see how I went from being 'amazing' to only having all the flaws in me. I think at times when she was mad at me for things, I think she was mad at herself too. Everybody wants to be loved and everybody seeks it out in some form. A lot of people coming out of a long-term relationship after being dumped go to the rebound. Its a pretty big revelation for me.
Links to articles:
http://www.thesite.org/sexandrelationships/singles/onthepull/ontherebound
http://www.faceromance.com/rebound-dating-relationship-mistakes/
I've been in an emotional wreck over the last year trying to figure out what happened. I've been up and down, still holding out hope that light would shine on me and the reasons for all this would be clear. I tried to get back to that particular happy place in many different ways and I couldn't. I even convinced her to work with me on a project hoping that this light would shine down and at least come to at least some understanding.
Unlucky/lucky for me I met someone who wasn't a rebound relationship but more like the best thing that ever happened to me. 1 year later and I'm still talking about this as if it so recent. Can anyone imagine how important this person was to me? What can I say to that? There's no point to harbor any ill-will or resentment. Perhaps I should have been more careful, more alert as to why things were happening.
There was even a time in October, where we had a conversation where my walls came down when she was doing that thing she did to me... It was eerily similar to a point when we were close. I didn't know what to think as it was happening and I wasn't sure if things were changing but I did know it was out of my control. I just had to be ready for the worst. I don't how that conversation even happened or why it happened from her end. Its been bugging me, because it went from that conversation into an almost disgust for me. I was a pest, a nuisance after that (her words not mine).
Well, it is my goal to find that type of relationship again. But in this world those kinds of relationships are extremely rare. Once again, its about keeping faith... I need a drink.
Look, Real Talk:
This blog is all about me documenting the unending monologue that runs in my head. It has to come out one way or another and perhaps this is the most productive. The second part of that is that I hope someone reads here and in some shape or form is inspired, is touched, is amused, is entertained, is interested. On a deeper level, I really hope that someone reads this and goes, yeah I got, I know what you're going through. I can empathise with you. I can see who you are really, thanks for being you!
And I really get little back from anyone so I have to ask myself is this blog doing enough for me? Maybe not. But I'll continue to write here hoping that it does.
As I was driving into work this morning to listening to sports radio the commercials came on. Usually I tune these commercials out seeing they have no relevance to me. I don't need to consolidate my debt, I don't need a free credit report, I'm not gambling on sports right now so no need for the hotline to get a free pick on Monday night's game, and I definitely don't have erectile disfunction (E.D.) So this guy was giving his testimonial for some ED company and he said me and my partner have no problems now, which raised my attention. Then he said she's completely satisfied. And I was like oh. Do gay guys have ED? That I wonder...
Those memories are as stubborn as the two of us on an issue. They won't go away and find a place somwhere in my mind. What I find to be a tragedy is that we couldn't continue those memories. I missed out on seeing her grow as a person and seeing me grow too. I'm not part of her life and thats a tragedy to me. I'm not there to pick her up when shes down and shes not there to make me smile. In those akward silences on the phone, most of them I was just smiling, enjoying her company over the phone. I don't know about her accomplishments and her obstacles. Its tough thinking where things would have gone, because so much changed in my life. At one point I was really close to moving to the east coast or to the south!!
What I miss...
I miss the late night phone conversations and having her fall asleep on me. It was even better in person.
I miss hearing her call me by her nicknames for me. It always seemed to give me a boost of confidence.
I miss her worrying about me and taking care of me. She was good at it.
I miss the expected smooches, especially the unexpected ones.
I miss her surprising me and always impressing me with what she could do and what she knew and how she handled situations.
I miss seeing that sparkle in her eyes and the way she looked at me. I could get lost in her eyes they were so deep and embracing.
I miss her always keeping me close. Touching me softly wrapping her feet around my leg when we ate out. She took a strong and powerful young man and made him better.
I miss her needing me. I miss how she made me feel.
The last year some worldy power has kept me away from certain people and away from situations and got me on track with a lot of things. I just don't know where its leading and I wish I had a crystal ball to tell me what its all leading to. The signs, keep pushing my thoughts in a certain way even when I don't want them to. Its a phenomenon on its own right. But its all for a reason. Onward and upward is what they say. But I'll always wonder....
Yes wasting, my time. If you're reading this possibly wasting yours.
This weekend marks one year exactly (I'm pretty sure) from the last weekend I spent as the significant other of a very, very special person to me. Unbelievable. Its unbelievable on how my life was then and how it is now. Boston, bean-town... What a city. My favorite East Coast city. Damn, I wish I could say I was there right now feeling the cold crisp air in my lungs and being overwhelmed visually by the colors and life of the such a historic city that feels more like a town. A commercial hub and in my business, a consulting a hub.
So this weekend is important to me. I'll explain why.
The memories are flowing hard, those perfect moments, those bursts of pure happiness. I have to state for the record, these are my thoughts and my feelings and my interpretation. No one can take it away from me.
Let explain why a 1 year later how I could possibly still have so much feeling for someone who broke my heart. In a psychoanalysis, someone would say that my pride of failing is holding me back. Maybe another view would say that I'm holding on to the best thing that happened to me because I can't see anything else better coming along. A Ph.D would say that I have some serious issues with relationships and I am not moved on because I can not deal with change.
I have my reasons. I know what my heart told me then and I know what I know now...
Those memories are so clear to me. But that is for another post.
right now I'm on a mission and I feel like I'm putting things on hold and leaving things open and doing all the things I've always done. I have this funny way of making it right in my head so that I'm neither putting it off, but making time and doing it right. It's like my whole idea on how I'm so CLUTCH. Because I absolutely have to be....
Yeah, I make it harder than it has to be and yeah is it really clutch if you had to do it anyways? I say I have to be motivated to get it done and I have to feel guilt to do it absolutely right. Maybe guilt is the wrong word but I don't know I have to build the value up for myself. Whatever, I will be definitely CLUTCH in the coming blog posts.
I would love ot question someone who has no idea who I am base my personality stricly off all my blog posts. I wonder what kind of person they would think I am? If you're reading this and you don't know me please let me know.
I would've posted it yesterday since it kinda goes with my post last night but it was late and I need ammo for tonight. It's a very good article and a must read.
Are "Should" and "Ought" Blocking Your Path to Love?
How to overcome three intentional roadblocks to love
Have you heard yourself saying things like "I should be thinking about my Sweetheart 24/7 or I must not be in love" or "I should know if he (or she) is the right one for me"? Or how about "We should have... (fill in the blank: the same sense of humor, a similar background, or compatible taste in furniture)"?
I find that lots of singles have rules that guide their love life. Some rules make good sense (like only dating people who are really single and available, economically stable, and live within the law). But many rules are unrealistic, harsh, or based on romantic myths. Then these singles end up comparing their dates with their guidelines, sensible or not, and making life decisions that have enormous consequences.
I am a romance coach, but I have also been a psychotherapist for over 30 years. I learned long ago to listen carefully to the language my clients use when they talk about themselves and their lives. In particular, I'd watch for the words "should" and "ought."
What's wrong with 'should' and 'ought'
While exceedingly and commonly used, "should" and "ought" could easily be eliminated from our vocabulary. At the very least, we would all feel a lot better. Should and ought are guilt-producing words: "I should spend more time with my mother," "I really ought to lose some weight." The sayer doesn't really intend to do what he is shoulding or oughting. If so, he'd say, "I will spend more time with Mom," or "I'm going to start dieting today."
Shoulding and oughting are like giving yourself a lash on the back: You are punishing yourself with your "I should" or "I ought" statements. Your guilt is eased with your punishment, making it possible to go on with your life, while never following through with what you said you should or ought to do.
In the case of love, shoulds and oughts give us a way out when we need it, just like being picky. Looking for love is loaded with anxiety: "What if it doesn't work?" "What if I find out I don't really love her?" "What if he finds out about (you fill in the blank)?" When your anxiety screams for relief, pulling out a good old should or ought can provide your escape hatch.
Top 'shoulds' and 'oughts': Road blocks to love
1. "I should be thinking about my Sweetheart 24/7 or I must not be in love." Odd as it may sound, some people never feel the intoxicating sensations we think of as "being in love." The ability to fall in love is on a continuum:
“Some people fall in and out of love very easily, some people never do.”
Some people fall in and out of love very easily, some people never do. Most of us are somewhere in between. Those people who never "fall in love" are still quite capable of loving and forming relationships. If you find yourself waiting for the "in love" sensation which never comes, the "I should be thinking about my Sweetheart 24/7 or I must not be in love" could keep you permanently single.
2. "I should know if he (or she) is the right one for me." Really? How? Of course there are better or worse choices, but assuming that your date meets your criteria of "good person" and the two of you enjoy each other, seem compatible, and don't irritate the heck out of each other, what more do you need? This "should" may be connected to your "falling in love" ability: If you are able to "fall in love," that biochemical process (it's like being drunk or high) helps surge you forward into a permanent relationship and over any questions or doubts.
3. "We should share the same ... (fill in the blank)." Why? One of the wonderful parts about finding a life partner is all the things that he or she knows and you don't, or is and you are not. Think of what you can learn from the differences. Or what you won't have to learn because your partner already knows.
Yes, some similarity is good, but why would you want someone just like you? You may be pretty terrific, but how boring would it be to be married to your carbon copy!
So pay attention to your inner thoughts about love and your dates. If "should" or "ought" crop up in your thinking, take note and challenge yourself. You may have set up a condition that is road-blocking your search for love.
Just by observing others and asking questions to married friends you can pick an amazing amount of experience. Yeah, you learn more on your own. They call it 'baptism under fire'. I love that phrase. Just because (sorry to go christianity on you) you are baptised under water. I think that's one of my top 10 phrases of all time because I've been baptised under fire. I digress, sorry. I think that you can a tremendous amount of information just from observing, sometimes more than actually being in a situation. I just think its how you process data. Somehow I can process data at times and create a hypothesis and it can be right and its pretty solid. That's how I got good at betting on football although I never do now. Some people can just take random info and turn it into something that makes logical sense to everyone.
The reason I am bringing this up is because I've sort of figured out relationships from the outside. Some of this is cliche because, its thats proven right. The other part is my observations.
1. You can't take things too seriously. I know from my own experience I took things way too seriously and so did my significant other. Its like, why are fighting about things that won't even happen and why do I care so much to make a point on somthing that isn't the end the world. There was some things that I thought were such a big deal to me that when I really looked closely at it, I'll do whatever she wants. Because I know if she's happy I'm happy. When you're stubborn and things don't go the way you want them to you try and force them to rather than not being bitter. When it comes to a lot of stuff I just make the most out things but there was time where I had to get in a mood and it really ruined some valuable time. It swings both ways too. The best relationships I've seen are ones where those fights that seem so stupid actually make you tighter as a couple. YOu can laugh about it... not right away but at some point soon. Isn't making up why we fight in the first place??
2. You have to comprimise. No one is going to be perfect all the time. Its like what outkast said, 'I know u like to think yo shit dont stink, but roses don't smell like poooopoooooo' For me I used to have a shorter temper and I used to take things without considering the circumstances around them. As if people were out to get me. And a lot of people in relationships really magnify the things that the other does because we're sensitive to it. That ok though. Because of there's a level of understanding. I work with 2 married couples and its a circus. I here these women who could be my mother, complain like a 22 year old about things that their partner does. It's cute. There's a charge that person puts in you that can make you so mad or so angry but its that emotional factor, that chemisry.
3. You are a better person because of your partner. You make each other better. That might be my own thing because I love to teach and I love to inspire and I absolutely love to see people grow. I see my parents and I see how my dad has changed and become a saint practically. I see my mom, well ok she doesn't really change but I see how shes become so flexible with my dad and his habits. She still nitpicks him, AND ME, but she's learned where its nothing to fight about.
There's a lot more but I really like these 3. Any thoughts? Do I hear an echo? echo? echo? If a tree falls in the forest does it make a sound? If a jabroni rights an obscure blog and doesn't really publicize it and doesn't get much a response is he really making a point or is it just fodder for the internet spiders looking to turn my posts into keyword searches and then accuse me of spam when I cover pop culture??
Can a man become a better man and a more complete person without having a 'significant other'?
Can I see the Cardinals actually win a game in when it counts? NO on that one.
I love illegal immigrants. They work extremely hard, they're family oriented, they do all the dirty work and things that we wouldn't want to do as a collective group, and they have some character as shown below. If you live in the Southwest an illegal immigrant has crossed paths with you at one point or another and you probably didn't even know it and weren't grateful for their contribution. Check out this article...
Illegal immigrant rescues boy whose mother died in Ariz. crash
Associated Press
Nov. 23, 2007 05:56 PM
A 9-year-old boy looking for help after his mother crashed their van in the southern Arizona desert was rescued by a man entering the U.S. illegally, who stayed with him until help arrived the next day, an official said.
The 45-year-old woman, who eventually died while awaiting help, had been driving on a U.S. Forest Service road in a remote area just north of the Mexican border when she lost control of her van on a curve on Thanksgiving, Sheriff Tony Estrada said.
The van vaulted into a canyon and landed 300 feet from the road, he said. The woman, from Rimrock, north of Phoenix, survived the impact but was pinned inside, Estrada said.
Her son, unhurt but disoriented, crawled out to get help and was found about two hours later by Jesus Manuel Cordova, 26, of Magdalena de Kino in the northern Mexican state of Sonora. Unable to pull the mother out, he comforted the boy while they waited for help.
The woman died a short time later.
“He stayed with him, told him that everything was going to be all right,” Estrada said.
As temperatures dropped, he gave him a jacket, built a bonfire and stayed with him until about 8 a.m. Friday, when hunters passed by and called authorities, Estrada said. The boy was flown to University Medical Center in Tucson as a precaution but appeared unhurt.
Cordova was taken into custody by Border Patrol agents, who were the first to respond to the call for help. He had been trying to walk into the U.S. when he came across the boy.
The boy and his mother were in the area camping, Estrada said. The woman's husband, the boy's father, had died only two months ago. The names of the woman and her son were not being released until relatives were notified.
Cordova likely saved the boy, Estrada said, and his actions should remind people not to quickly characterize illegal immigrants as criminals.
“They do get demonized for a lot of reasons, and they do a lot of good. Obviously this is one example of what an individual can do,” he said.
Everyone knows what the wide range of emotions we all have. And the majority of people only show that wide 'range' (call it what you want) to those we feel comfortable with, those who can bring down our walls. You ever get that feeling when you're with somebody, your closest friends, your significant other, your closest family members. When I say range of emotions, it includes a lot of other stuff, just things you would say, stuff you would do...
In my working life I operate in a small window and rarely do I deviate it from it. I can sense that people want more and they're trying to get to know me. I just can't get out of that window in a working environment. My best friends know me pretty well they've seen the entire repetoire. I just don't see then enough to even be myself like that.
The reason I'm even thinking about this is the range I've seen in others that I know very well. When you've seen the whole person, its tough to not question why that window has shrunk. Yeah things changes, relationship dynamics swing, I understand. But I can't stress how confusing it is when that range widens and shrinks inexplicably all over the place. When that window goes up and down its tough to judge where to stand. It's don't want to assume anything and you don't want to feel estranged but it can hurt sometimes....
I wonder what it is... The phrase, 'all you have to do is ask' is irrelevant here. Asking is an invitation to a tongue lashing or even worse; nothing. Two tears in a bucket... you know the rest.
They say good help is hard to find these days. Depends on what you're doing but definitely if I need something done by a hard working, honest, and grateful for the work I'll get some immigrants. I hired some Mexican guys to work on my office. (It's official - 13251 Hawthorne Blvd Hawthorne, CA 90250, the security system will be on tommorrow and there's nothing valuable!!) I think you can apply it to almost all skill levels. This was best thing I heard all day:
"When can you start?"
"15 MINUTES"
That was exactly what I needed to hear!!!
I have so much on my mind and so much it just makes me wince. I'm in need of a lot of things and I desire a lot of things. One way or the other I'm wasting time and effort on something or the other and it makes me very uneasy, almost depressed. Eh......
Where did the weekend go?
I think this guy is a jackass and a total overacheiver. He's egotistical and refuses to adjust with the times. He hung on the coat-tails of Shaq, Kobe, and Michael Jordan. The guy is sooo overrated and since he coaches the Lakers I can't stand him. That being said, this guy is a classic! The stuff he says, I don't understand how he gets away with it. He calls out opponents, his own players, management and people don't really see the controversy in the media. I see it for sure and I want his publicist. Also, this guy has a way with words and I swear he practices this stuff at home. He's my new public speaking idol!! Read below:
NEW YORK (AP) — The NBA has spoken with the Los Angeles Lakers about a comment coach Phil Jackson made following Tuesday night's game in San Antonio.
The Spurs made 13 three-pointers in their 107-92 victory, and Jackson was asked if too much penetration was leading to open outside shooters.
"We call this a Brokeback Mountain game, because there's so much penetration and kickouts," Jackson said. "It was one of those games."
The 2005 film, which won three Oscars, depicts two cowboys who conceal their homosexual affair.
"The remarks are in poor taste, and the Lakers have assured us such remarks will not occur in the future," league spokesman Brian McIntyre said.
it doesnt get easier from this point on, only more difficult. especially with the holiday season and then the tax season, OMG. i can barely keep my eyes open. gnite.
It's been exactly 1 week since I started work. I more productive in a single day then I was 1 week ago. My glitch is that I need to feel the pressure of a deadline to actually bring it hard. When I start going through it makes sense to me. I have no real motivation to get something done. In school I waited until the exam was too close and I studied like it was the apocalypse. I always waited until the end of the month to reach goals for work. I waited until the end of quarters or just the end of basketball games to take big shots or make big plays on defense. I always play a better golf game when I know the score is close, same with video games. I always do my laundry when I know I HAVE to. I change for the better right before and after the girl is gone.... If I could just be awesome all the time, I'd be simply a phenomenon. We all can't be those.
When you have the reputation of being CLUTCH you never question it. But when you are clutch because there's no other option well, you are me: THR ROBERT HORRY OF LIFE. I loathe that guy... Meh.
If you live somewhat in the sports world then you know what its like to have Boston jammed in your face with the Celtics Trio, Boston College's almost undefeated season, the New England Patriots and they're dominance (and red-asses, they are so bent that people have called them cheaters that they want to drop 7 touchdowns on everyone), and ofcourse my boy Schilling and the Red Sox winning the world series. That's one part of it.
Then with my friends circle and my involvement in certain I will always have ties to Boston and other parts of the East Coast so I'm excluding that from this theory. But there's always those random things that really start to make me wonder. The guy who works in the cubicle next to mine is a true Bostonian with the accent and the attitude. In fact, he actually pitched for the Red Sox a million years ago and got his MBA from Harvard. Then there's my door guy from event, another Bostonian which I didn't even know until we talked. That was weird. All these random things that happen within the course of the day that catch me off guard because I'm not looking for anything, it just seems to find me. Another recent city, although nowhere near the frequency that Boston seems to come up is Detroit. But its not even a contest.
I don't know what it is that's makes this happen but I wish I knew why. There's always the possibility of the a coincidence but it would need to be a pretty big one to convince me. It might be my mind playing tricks on me too. Or there's some other reason and since I can't pinpoint anything thats what makes me wonder. Meh.
Most ridiculous British law:
1. It is illegal to die in the Houses of Parliament (27 percent)
2. It is an act of treason to place a postage stamp bearing the British monarch upside-down (seven percent)
3. In Liverpool, it is illegal for a woman to be topless except as a clerk in a tropical fish store (six percent)
4. Mince pies cannot be eaten on Christmas Day (five percent)
5. In Scotland, if someone knocks on your door and requires the use of your toilet, you must let them enter (four percent)
6. A pregnant woman can legally relieve herself anywhere she wants, including in a policeman's helmet (four percent)
7. The head of any dead whale found on the British coast automatically becomes the property of the king, and the tail of the queen (3.5 percent)
8. It is illegal to avoid telling the tax man anything you do not want him to know, but legal not to tell him information you do not mind him knowing (three percent)
9. It is illegal to enter the Houses of Parliament in a suit of armour (three percent)
10. In the city of York it is legal to murder a Scotsman within the ancient city walls, but only if he is carrying a bow and arrow (two percent)
Better sleep doesn’t have to come in a pill.
For people with chronic insomnia, studies show that simple behavioral and psychological treatments work just as well, and sometimes better, than popular medications, according to a report in The Journal of Family Practice.
The medical journal Sleep last year reported on five high-quality trials that showed cognitive behavioral therapy helped people suffering from insomnia fall asleep sooner and stay asleep longer. Another American Journal of Psychiatry analysis of 21 studies showed that behavioral treatment helped people fall asleep nearly nine minutes sooner than sleep drugs. In other measures, sleep therapy worked just as well as drugs, but without any side effects.
The behavioral strategies for better sleep are deceptively simple, and that’s one reason why many people don’t believe they can make a difference. One of the most effective methods is stimulus control. This means not watching television, eating or reading in bed. Don’t go to bed until you are sleepy. Get up at the same time every day, and don’t nap during the day. If you are unable to sleep, get out of bed after 15 minutes and do something relaxing, but avoid stimulating activity and thoughts.
So-called sleep hygiene is also part of sleep therapy. This includes regular exercise, adding light-proof blinds to your bedroom to keep it dark and making sure the bed and room temperatures are comfortable. Eat regular meals, don’t go to bed hungry and limit beverages, particularly alcohol and caffeinated drinks, around bedtime.
Finally, don’t try too hard to fall asleep, and turn the clock around so you can’t see it. Watching time pass is one of the worst things to do when you’re trying to fall asleep.
It may be hard to believe, but studies show these simple steps really do make a meaningful difference for people with sleep problems. These interventions are based on the notion that thoughts and behaviors can “hyper-arouse” the central nervous system and deregulate sleep cycles, resulting in chronic insomnia, reports Family Practice.
If these steps don’t work, talk to your doctor about a referral to a sleep therapist, who can also teach you additional relaxation techniques to help bring on sleep. Sometimes, a therapist might work with you to reset your sleep-wake schedule, a more involved process whereby patients adjust their bedtime each night over the course of a few weeks.
And for more information about sleeping pills, read this story in The Times.
So tommorrow I start full-time work in an office for a company with a long-term plan and room for growth. First time since 2004. I had a good run. It's pretty amazing to me that I've been able to get by without working anywhere for the last 3 years and I've done a hell of a lot I would say. I made money and paid my bills, completed an MBA, grew 2 businesses, worked on over 20 consulting engagements, traveled the world, had some some incredible experiences, had an amazing girlfriend, learned parts of different languages, just over all had the time of my life.
My friends joke with me and are still wondering how I did it? People always ask me why they're getting emails at 3am and what do I do all day and how do I get time off the way I do and how much money do I actually make.
Well that era is done and I'm glad I got to do it. I doubt I will get the chance to do it again but at the same I'm glad that I'm doing something a grow-up does. I'm unofficially all grown up. Grown-ups tuck their shirts in. Grown-ups get up early and don't take breaks in the middle of the day to go their bestfriend's work and play on myspace together after lunch.
I don't wanna grow up, I'm a ToysRUS kid!!!
I don't know how I lived without HD in the past. OMG. Watching sports in HD is better than being at the game in the front row! I might not ever go to a game again! If you're thinking, 'hey idiot, its not that big of a deal'. Well... I really don't want to get into it right now about what my thoughts are on so this is good for me.
2:33AM on a Saturday night in North Scottsdale at my best friend's house. I come back from swimming with the kids to find a boot on my vehicle. Yes, a boot on my vehicle in a private neighborhood. A boot on my vehicle placed, not by the City of Scottsdale but by the private security company. Something new to me since I had been parking there for 12 years. I wasn't forewarned already. And they're supposed to boot after 2AM but why would you boot a vehicle between 2AM and 2:30??? You boot overnight parking at like 3 or 4 not after 15 minutes.
I don't want to go into the whole thing but basically we called up the guy and had a 2 and half hour standoff with this idiot guy. I still to this moment dont know what his motivation was. I don't know if we was pissed at the world and this was his payback or if he thought he was following the rules.
He couldn't get a hold of his manager, he tried to extort me under the table. We went through the whole cycle anger, negotiating, pleading, anger, etc... If you've ever read the Old Man and the Sea by Ernest Hemmingway, you know what the struggle is like. I wasn't sure if I could win but I knew I had principle on my side so I stuck it out! Guess what! I got out of paying anything for it and in the end I had to respect the guy no matter what because he pushed me to my limits.
They must be punjabi.
GAUHATI, India - Six Asiatic wild elephants were electrocuted as they went berserk after drinking rice beer in India's remote northeast, a wildlife official said Tuesday.
Nearly 40 elephants came to a village on Friday looking for food. Some found beer, which farmers ferment and keep in plastic and tin drums in their huts, said Sunil Kumar, a state wildlife official.
They got drunk, uprooted a utility pole carrying power lines and were electrocuted in Chandan Nukat, a village nearly 150 miles west of Shillong, the capital of Meghalaya state, Kumar said.
"There would have been more casualties had the villagers not chased them away," said Dipu Mark, a local conservationist.
The elephants are known to have a taste for rice beer brewed by tribal communities in India's northeast. Four wild elephants died in similar circumstances in the region three years ago.
India's northeast accounts for the world's largest concentration of wild Asiatic elephants with the states of Assam and Meghalaya alone estimated to have 7,000 of them.
"It's great to have such a huge number of elephants, but the increasing man-elephant conflict following the shrinkage in their habitat due to the growing human population is giving us nightmares," said Pradyut Bordoloi, a former forest and environment minister for Assam.
2 big things going in the US right now and my world. The World Series and the fires that are burning down Southern California around me.
If anyone wasn't suprised that the Red Sox crushed tonight than you haven't been paying attention or you're most likely a Rockies fan. I don't have anything against the Rockies but I do have a grief with their fans. My team, the DBacks got straight destroyed by the Rocks but we weren't that good to be honest. We showed all our weaknesses that we had and it was quite embarrassing for me knowing how much better our team had played and since we did have the best record in the entire National League by just being good when the game was on the line. But Rockie fan is obnoxious and cocky and way over their head in this series. Your dream dies in a week Rockie fan. I was already a BoSox fan before that and even more so now.
These fires are crazy. The last 3 days I've felt like I've been on Mars from the Sun being blocked out by the smoke. Even though the closest fires are at least 50 miles away the ashes are falling down in LA and it was about 90 degrees today, I have no idea why. I want to say its because of the fires but I don't know the natural weather answer for that.
It's sobering when you realize that the people are losing lives, losing homes, losing all their memories. What would I do if I had to run in and grab whatever meant the most to me in a matter of a few moments. I have way too much shit and I would lose ALOT of memories. Damn! I just bought a big screen LCD TV too!
Pray along with me for rain, the safety of the heroes out there fighting the fires and protecting our communities in the material sense.
I am extremely proud of my mom and my family and my family's friends for putting together such an amazing weekend of ceremonies for the temple. And not only that, I challenge any temple that has a website this dope. Mucho props to DishUncle.
http://hindutempleaz.org/
Princeton Review and Entrepreneur Magazine rank MBA Entrepreneurship Emphasis #11
LOS ANGELES, Oct. 11, 2007 - The College of Business Administration of Loyola Marymount University was named among the best in the nation for its undergraduate and graduate entrepreneurship programs by The Princeton Review and Entrepreneur Magazine. The undergraduate program was rated 10th best, up from 13th last year. The graduate program was rated 11th.
“We teach our students to believe in themselves, we give them the skills to take the first step and we show them how to learn from their failures,” said Fred Kiesner, Conrad N. Hilton Chair in Entrepreneurship.
Joining LMU in the top 10 of the undergraduate rankings were Babson College in Massachusetts and the University of Arizona. LMU’s undergraduate program was ranked higher than other well-known national universities, including USC and the University of Notre Dame. LMU’s graduate program ranking at 11th marked the first time that the program has appeared in the top 25. Colleges and universities were ranked based on evaluations of faculty, students, academics and outside-the-classroom support and experiences. More than 900 institutions were surveyed.
LMU’s entrepreneurship program was launched in 1972. The university was one the first in the nation to formally teach entrepreneurship.
The rankings will be published in the November issue of “Entrepreneur” that hits newsstands on Oct. 23.
Yes, if you read my last blog then yeah I still have some venting to do. People still don't understand why I care so much. BECAUSE NO ONE ELSE DOES. Its a trait I got from my mother. A significant characteristic where I must follow through and make sure that people and things are taken care of.
People don't get me. Yeah I'm passionate, what else would I be? Dr. Kiesner (http://www.lmu.edu/Page22948.aspx) inspired me to be passionate and a leader and a problem solver. And I know that most people are apathetic and don't want to commit to things. I am committed and I have thought things through. So listen, I have a system for doing things even though it doesn't look like it. Just follow my system. I tried to imagine a world where I didn't care. So say for instance, I wasn't as active or involved with my business because of my partners. Well first thing, we never would have started it, I was the one that pushed it. Second, we never would have opened the website, I was the one that have the vision for e-commerce. Third, we would have went out of business in the first 6 months if I didn't take care of the customers. No one else cared to do that.
If you think I'm bullshitting or viewing with my blinders on, I know what I'm talking about. Yes I am, but I do know that I am the straw that stirs the drink and things might get done without me........ I just never waited to see what that would like.....
No one really wants to help you, no one really cares. And anything you have to do you have to do it yourself. I'm sick of it. Don't ask me for anything because unless I get something out of it I'm done. People have taken advantage of my good, generous nature for way too long and I'm officially over it. I could make a list here of everything but I'll just get even more frustrated than I already am and considering I already feel helpless, I have to do everything myself and all that does is make me even more bitter and scarred.
Leave me alone.
You can try and be a leader but if no one follows you, you know what you are? Some fucking asshole standing alone looking for something that isn't coming.
I have to bite this from How I Met Your Mother from tonight. Damn, i haven't said bite in forever. To use it in another sentence, 'y u gotta bite my style'. So I wonder what would or do people say when they try and set me up. Because I'm sure its the same some stuff, hes cute, hes funny, smart, sweet, he dresses good, and comes from good family and is religious and hes not a FOB or a nerd (in the most popular definition). But what about the other half. Because its getting to that age where if I was a girl I would ask whoever was playing matchmaker, 'why is thie guy single then? whats the BUT'
It's hard to turn that inside and really look at yourself from others viewpoints at to what your negative qualities are. So I'm going to make it funny for my own entertainment.
He's clumsy - expect if you eat out, he will spill on himself. Its a genetic thing that he inherited from his mom. (FYI there is a downside to big boobies)
He's a yuppy - falls in love with classics and fads and gets too involved and sentimental, nostalgic over things like.... Lord of the Rings and Star Wars and Amoeba music store and the beach or the Ken McDonald Golf Course or THE SPOT(see nerd blast from above).
He'S a Metrosexual - he does kind fancy his clothes and his eyebrows and how his butt looks in jeans all those things that men shouldn't pay that much attention to much less worry be concerned about.
eh, eff it I'm out. see ya in daygo
I hope I don't miss out on a chance to blog cuz I got a ton of things I wanted to talk about. But I will get a great chance this week in San Diego on my down time, I hope....
Numb
by: Anisha Meha Vasani
If I have no love
I will have no hate
but if I sacrifice love
I will have no fate
how do I live
if I have nothing to give
an empty heart
plays my part
I dont want to exist
in this reminisce
Void of emotion
Lack of notion
nothing is everything
something is anything
no heart, no mind, no soul
Existence is my role
i love nerds... and YES i am nerd and will always be a nerd and if you ask me about politics, sports, comics, movies, physics, time and space theorems, music, pop culture, geography, history, or anything, etc, etc you will get at least a semi-nerdy response. this show is pretty damn funny...
Finding the right job/career and finding the special someone is pretty much the same thing. In both pathways I'm very hesitant of permanence even though thats what I'm looking for all along. I'm not ready for the definition in both areas, I like knowing in the moment where I belong and relish the future possibilities. But in both cases you do your due diligence. You look at all the factors but hopefully we can make both decisions with our heart.
And to my shattering disillusionment I've realized that only so many are lucky. I don't know where life is taking me and I'm just enjoying the ride. I mean if people really look and see the life that I had the tremendous opportunity to live, I am the luckiest man on the planet. I really believe that. That's why I get arrogant.
Ok it's late and I have to chauffeur my kid brother around to check out colleges in LA. Remember the one of the best quotes I've ever remembered. 'the squeaky wheel gets the oil'
so much to say but can be summarized by john mayer when he surprised us all and came on stage with dave and said this...
'i am who i am because of dave matthews band'
amen brother....
Now that I'm on the back end of my twenties trying to figure out where the hell the time went, I realize that these years should be celebrated.
That's an entirely different philosophy than what I had about 2 weeks ago. 2 weeks ago I wanted to forget this day and buy myself in the ground just get away from it. I don't think many people like the idea of getting older because then we start questioning our lives. We see how things didn't turn or how we got to where we were and maybe we don't like it. I'm indifferent about my own life right now shockingly.
When I over think it, I have a million reasons to hide from the world for a day and pity myself. But really? I don't think that's who I am. I'm older, I'm wiser, I'm tougher than a year ago. Life isn't so bad and career-wise things are in a great place.
I try not think about where I was a year ago at this time. I had a good year last year and now I'm in my 26th. I still have a lot to accomplish and a lot to experience. I think one thing I learned this past year is you can't get too high or too low because you don't know what's around that bend.
I'm going to take the day off tomorrow to do whatever I feel like. I think my own world is ok with that. Since I've been slaving away I think I can retreat for a weekday to enjoy my solitude. Maybe I'll get a massage or drink beer all day and watch old tv re-runs.
I know I got a good year coming up.
Some of my favorite lyrics from it from various songs:
La la la la
Wait 'til I get my money right
La la la la
Then you can't tell me nothing right?
Excuse me, is you saying something?
Uh, uh, you can't tell me nothing
You can't tell me nothing
Uh, uh, you can't tell me nothing
-------------------------------------------------
I don't know if you got a man or not
If you made plans or not
If God put me in your plans or not
I'm trippin', this drink got me sayin' alot
But I know that God put you in front of me
So how the hell could you front on me
-------------------------------------------------
Th-th-that that don't kill me
Can only make me stronger
I need you to hurry up now
Cause I can't wait much longer
I know I got to be right now
Cause I can't get much wronger
Man I been waitin' all night now
That's how long I've been on ya
I need ya right now
I need ya right now
------------------------------------------------
My big brother was Bigs brother
So here's a few words from your kid brother
If you admire somebody you should go ahead and tell um
People never get the flowers while they could still smell um
A idol in my eyes, God of the game
Heart of the city,Rockafella chain
Never be the same, never be another
Number 1 young Hov also my big brother
Amy Winehouse... she's got a billion more issues than Angelina, but shes only 24 she sings to my soul. In addition to her unique look, shes jewish and shes from England. I'm not really into the tats or her husband. YES, YES, YES. For whatever reason, I got a HUGE thing for singers and I lose it to jazz singers. If you ever heard Billie Holiday and she sang those blues to your soul you know what I'm talking about. Why is it all the good ones have the issues and never live up to their full potential? Instead we're just left with lightning in the bottle saying what if... Just off the top of my head Tupac, Biggie, Charlie Parker, Kurt Kobain, Jimi Hendrix, Jim Morrison, Len Bias, Chris Farley, and the list sadly continues. Please Amy, at make it to 30.
You know? From that one song. Its hard for me to admit it but sometimes I get so lonely. I have friends and family but I don't know I feel like I can't talk to them about everything. I always feels like I'm holding back when I talk to them. It sucks when you don't have someone to talk to. Some companionship really goes a long way when you haven't had any in a long time. I think its my time of the month... eh
When you try your best but you don't succeed
When you get what you want but not what you need
When you feel so tired but you can't sleep
Stuck in reverse.
When the tears come streaming down your face
When you lose something you can't replace
When you love someone but it goes to waste
Could it be worse?
Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you
And high up above or down below
When you're too in love to let it go
But if you never try you'll never know
"Just what your worth"
Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you
Tears stream, down on your face
When you lose something you cannot replace
Tears stream down your face
And I..
Tears stream, down on your face
I promise you I will learn from my mistakes
Tears stream down your face
And I..
Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you.
The movie Knocked UP. It's a great movie not only because the dialog is not like any movie I've seen and its just freakin hilarious as well, but it was extra special to me because it got me thinking.
Even though its one of the most unwanted of scenarios (impregnating a stranger), I thought it was a very similar concept. Arranged marriage. It's a crude simile but I think you can modernize it and make it work. They're both mainly judged on first impressions, superficialities and some chemistry. One takes alcohol to get the 2 together and the other takes family pressure. One takes a baby to make a bond and other takes the sanctity of marriage.
That all being said, it made me feel good that the 2 end up together in the end. Sorry if you haven't seen the movie yet but it doesn't ruin anything for you, trust me. The guy in a real life scenario probably wouldn't have had any chance with the girl and she would have never noticed what a good guy and good father he was otherwise. Him and her both had played the cards they were dealt and just made the best of out of it. They ended up being happy with a happy family. My point why can't we be happy with what's in our lives? We only make the most of out of situations until we're forced to.
I'll be blogging here for the next week so please check it out and check out this website so you can get info on stuff.
www.yja.org/blog
www.yja.org/paryushan2007
My apartment complex almost burned down tonite. It sounds silly to say that but in reality, there was a pretty decent size fire the building adjacent to mine. A fire broke out and the alarms went off. Me thinking this another fire alarm prank or some fluke ringing I went to shut my window. 2 minutes later my roomate is banging on my door telling me it was a real fire.
So we run outside to investigate and there's people running all over the place and screaming. It was like downtown Bagdad or something. about 20 feet on the first floor from my roomates side of the apartment there was a pillar of black smoke going up into the air. I saw a bunch of people trying to get the emergency hose working with little success.
There was another 'drero'(a word I just made up combining drunk and hero) trying to run into the apartment and see if there was anyone inside. If you saw the flames you would understand why this guy wasn't thinking clearly. I can't prove that he was drunk but he was definitely looking to be a hero when there was no way he could be.
I took a few steps back to get away from the smoke and I saw one of my neighbor's children. They have 6 kids. 6 very respectable, very adorable, very friendly and cute kids. I saw the oldest son running around in a panic taking action. That's pretty commendable for a high school kid. But then I started wondering where they're parents were and if I should watch over them and get them away from the smoke.
All of a sudden my underneath neighbor's wife throws a hose at me so now I'm trying to get this hose hooked up and working and it takes me a few minutes because obviously the stress has caught up to me and I'm not moving as fast as my mind wants to. Somehow the flame goes down.
The fire department shows up. Everyone is wondering is someone is inside. I have to decide on if I should stay down and see or go up and avoid it. I do know that there is a black cat that lives in that apartment and I started getting sad. Imagine anyone getting trapped in a fire regardless what or who it is.
I'll only know tomorrow what happened. I'm just thankful from what I know is that no person was harmed. Hopefully no animals. I'm feeling much better now that the smoke is out of me and I will be getting up and inspecting every single alarm that goes off from now on.
Out of all the people, I'm pretty sure my life is the craziest. Not that I live the craziest life or I have the most epic stories, but based on how opportunities and how things change so quickly.
2 weeks ago I was dying to get the opportunity to work this company www.greencentury.com . Doing what I think I want to do, Marketing Management. There is one thing though... this job would have taken me out of my comfort zone and put me squarely in I would consider, Hell's Kitchen - Boston, MA. The funny part is how I found this job randomly looking for investment opportunities in Green companies. Somehow I thought this was destiny for me and I when I followed up with a lot of ambition. I was told I wasn't what they were looking for.
Well, it made me think long and hard on what I wanted to do from that moment through the rest of my life. My doorstep was flooded with opportunities and my confidence was weak after Green Century dismissed me. So it was so hard to decide. Because the most obvious question was, well if I was willing to move to Boston for this job, then what would stop me from moving to San Fransisco for a similar opportunity if I can find it? Especially, with my roommate telling me that he was ready to move on it made me think, what the in the blue hell am I doing here in Los Angeles?
I tried to do some soul searching but business was so busy and so many things were happening I didn't get much of a chance to. So this has what has transpired.
Today, I just signed a 9 month lease with my current roommate (Thank God) that keeps me in LA until July 2008.
*My dad approached me on the opportunity to open up a franchise business in LA as his partner and I am in the process of researching locations and signing a contract.
*I have hired a recruiter/career specialist to find me a Marketing Management job.
*I taking our growing business and delegating to my business partners
*I am building partnerships and alliances in SoCal. Right now this is where my head lays and I shouldn't be attached to it, I'm just happy that I am here for now. When fate takes me wherever it takes me than that's fine.
*I have some amazing consulting opportunities that my future cloudy but bright because regardless something is going to pan out.
*I got sunburnt driving a convertible since my car has been is in the shop. I realized a couple things. I need a convertible or a motorcycle. And that I am so lucky to live where I do.
*I've put a lot of faith in that things will work out.
Before I start piling on Miss Teen South Carolina for her misuse of the english language and giving me something to laugh and make fun of for the rest of my life, I just want to tell you why its ok. She'll be fine because she's attractive and she'll get by. There's no need to feel sorry for her because she put herself in the public eye and she got rattled and spewed some verbal diarrhea.
My favorite parts:
1. US Americans
2. some people in our country dont have maps... - yeah thats the solution we dont have maps, lets hand them out like bibles
3. therefore, such as.... - all-time classic right there. trying to sound smart but just not pulling it off. thats a damn fine US American right there!!
4. the Iraq - that's almost borderline racist to me, I can hear her saying the blacks, the asians, the latinos... maybe thats just me, regardless its pretty funny
6. help South Africa and the Asian countries - how did they get dragged into this??
7. if you watch closely you can see where she thinks shes on a roll but she flames out, and it really wasnt much of a roll
8. the BELL!!! hahaha, they had to shut her down!!
And his car....
What kind of moron to do you have to be? So this guy backed out of my friend's culdesac up in the supernice part of Beverly Hills going god knows how fast. He said he was on the phone and that he wasn't paying attention. I was inside at my friends get together. Luckily one of my friends went around the corner to go check out Brittney Spears' house and heard the crash came held the guy there until we could all come out.
Here's the punch line; this jackass was at the party! I didn't even know it because he was outside drinking and I was inside hanging with my college friends. Not that there was more than 25 people there, but his house is big enough to not see someone especially if you're not looking for them.
Another hassle to deal with...
This guy was typical Beverly Hills kid and he's lucky I didn't call the cops or he would've gotten a DUI. At least I have a convertible for the next week or so...
Principles
1. God Exists: One Absolute OM.
One Trinity: Brahma, Vishnu, Maheshwara (Shiva)
Several divine forms
2. All human beings are divine
3. Unity of existence through love
4. Religious harmony
5. Knowledge of 3 Gs: Ganga (sacred river), Gita (sacred script), Gayatri (sacred mantra)
DISCIPLINES
1. Satya (Truth)
2. Ahimsa (Non-violence)
3. Brahmacharya (Celibacy, non-adultery)
4. Asteya (No desire to possess or steal)
5. Aparighara (Non-corrupt)
6. Shaucha (Cleanliness)
7. Santosh (Contentment)
8. Swadhyaya (Reading of scriptures)
9. Tapas (Austerity, perseverance, penance)
I have to make some major decisions this week. 1 was made for me and it freaking sucks. The decision would have been very hard but atleast I would've made it for myself. I might talk about that later because its wayyy tooo tied to too many other things.
Way too tired, way too late. Curb my inner monologue until later when things seem more clear. Lets just same I'm sleeping on it...
But I do have one highlight for the day. Someone told me that I was selling them to the dogs... hahaha
What was meant was that I was throwing them to the wolves, or throwing them under the bus. For the first time ever, I sold someone to the dogs. How could I do that to someone?!?!
It took me a long time to say this without having any doubt or reservations but now I know this to be fact.
My ex-girlfriend continues to look for ways to tear me apart. Voluntarily working with her its more evident than before. It seems that anytime anything goes wrong its somehow related to my blunders or negligence. And when others make mistakes theyre given the benefit of the doubt or have a logical reason as to why they made a mistake. But those rules don't apply to me if I try to use them.
Imagine someone trying to blame you for their flight being delayed.
On the other hand I try to be sensible and not bring any personal feelings into this business relationship. I don't know...
That's what mom always says anyways.
You know there's a reason why they call them ex-girlfriends. We don't call them friends, we don't call them acquaintances, or whatever. It's because they remember you were to them and they remind you of that intentionally, unintentionally.. consciously, subconciously. You can't be anything better but you can be worse.
You can do your best to keep things superficial and pleasant without getting involved. You can keep to yourself and work with them if you have to. But they just do their best to push those crazy buttons. Because there's no way they talk to other people the way they talk to you and vice-versa. And that's why I need to go soak in the hot tub.
>(
This summer came and went.
My good friend Raja came and went.
Another year came and went.
And somehow I still feel like I'm in the same place that I was last year at this time.
Kinda deflating....
One of my favorite phrases of all time. What former Boston Redsox outfielder said when he demanded a trade to another team. He said if he wasnt traded, he would go into, "Operation Shutdown" for the rest of the season. That's hilarious!
Anyways my body is going into Operation Shutdown right now. I played 2 hours of some of the most intense basketball I've played in years. Not only that, it was good run and ofcourse I shined like the star I am, hahah!
I needed the stress relief and I needed to feel like I just exhausted alot of that stress on the court. Problem is my body is in shock. At one point I thought my heart was going to explode out of my chest because of the cardio workout. And mind you a play twice a week so thats a pretty intense workout. My head is exhausted, my body is drained and I'm going to sleep the earliest I have in weeks, months maybe.
My body is going to take it out on me even more tommorrow I'm sure.
The Ladder Theory is assumed to be correct for all classical phenomena. There do seem to be some "hidden" variables that modify the Ladder to some extent. These variables do not affect the rating system, nor do they affect the fundamental theorems of the Ladder. They do, however, modify how we act with regard to the Ladder.
These are the hidden variables that have been identified.
Religiosity:
While most people, even people who believe in God, will have sex before they are
married and thus fall under the rules of the ladder, some people are so religious they will not have sex until they are married. In this case, the Ladder should be modified as follows: change instances of 'would have sex with' to be 'would like to have sex with.' This works because while religious people have the same impulses, they choose to deny them as opposed to embracing them.
Drunkenness:
Of course when drunk we do things we wouldn't do otherwise. Usually when sobriety sets in, there is a return to the tenets of the ladder theory. In most cases, it should be noted, repressed Americans use being drunk as an excuse to do what they wanted to do anyway, so one should be very careful in applying this variable. For example, I'm drunk as I type this, but I would have typed it anyway, even though I might fall back on that excuse if there are a lot of typos in there or it doens't stand up to peer review. Do not let me get away with this. thats not me thats the original author, im as sober as a monkey.
Loyalty:
A lot of people have asked about the significant others of friends and if they are special cases of the Ladder. They are not. These are not your friends. These are virtual friends. For example, a friend of mine is hooking up with a girl. I like her, she's great, we get along, etc... But when they break up she is dead to me. Or if the friend leaves the picture the normal rules of the Ladder apply. So are we really friends? Of course not. We are conditional friends. This does not affect where she goes on the Ladder. Think of it like this: the Ladder is a rating system, and I'll rate her along with everyone else based on how much I would like them.
What desperation does is shift downward the line of quality. There is a line on the ladder that is the quality of the last person you were with. Since one of the purposes of life, if not the purpose, is to move up the ladder, you want someone above this line. Sometimes you can't find someone above this line. This leads to a virtual shift in the line downward as one gets more and more in need. But in terms of what a person wants, nothing changes -- you'd leave your desperation fuck for someone else with the requisite ladder attributes.
Hidden Variables and Sanity
Note that all known hidden variables are indicative of an altered consciousness of some kind. At the 'limit of sanity' the Classical ladder's rating system still applies. So I don't feel that these change the core theory, but explain times when the theory is not able to be applied because your perception is wrong. I don't agree that these are altered states of mind accept for being hammered. Everything else is realistic and fiber in a human moral formula. There's all these things that we take into consideration then thare's all these things that we come realize. That's why we have to think things through and get stressed about it.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
IF A MAN FINDS YOU ATTRACTIVE YOU CANNOT BE FRIENDS
Many women want to argue this point and say things like " I have lots of guy friends." Maybe. There are exactly 3 cases identified whereby a guy and a girl can be friends:
1. The guy is gay
2. The guy does not find you attractive.
3. The guy already has a woman much higher than you on the ladder
4. You're related somehow in blood or some other way.
Even Nietzsche knew this. Most guys know this intuitively. Most girls doubt. I have a challenge for all of you girls who still doubt. Pick a guy who does not meet any of the criterion on the above list that you think is your friend. Then ask yourself this question: If you were both alone at his place one night, and you excused yourself to the bathroom and came out naked and asked him to have sex with you would he:
1. Tell you he doesn't want to risk the beautiful friendship you have created with messy physical entanglements.
2. Comply
Remember this only works if you are honest with yourself.
Rock the Bells was unbelievable. I got on stage for Wu-tang clan's performance (my favorite musical group of all-time) and Rage Against the Machine. It was so freaking awesome I can't even put it into words. I'll have to put the pictures up once I get them. I mean it was just amazing to see all the groups I wanted to see. It was an entirely different to be on stage under a scaffolding stage right a few feet away...
Even though that concert was time-consuming and doubly exhausting, it was so worth it and I'll cherish those memories forever! Very few people I think have seen in that state of euphoria. The people that I talked to after the concert said I couldn't be more excited in my life from the sounds of it. Yeah pretty much...
IMPORTANT DISCLAIMER!
This image of the Man's ladder is not completely in-line with what my modified version of this theory is. For everywhere it says 'fuck' change that with would have a relationship and/or hook-up. Trust me girls, there's plenty of guys would hook-up with you in a moment's notice if you offered to. And the scary part is a lot of guys that you consider friends would surprise you. Also, what is scary are the guys that wouldn't either. 
alt="Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket">
So it should be self-evident, if you are following this at all, that the people you want to be with the most will be at the top of the ladder. Descending down to the bottom of the ladder we pass the following people:
1. The people we really want, who may even be out of our league, are on top but not necessarily a reality.
2. Then come the people we like we just have some hesitations or have a hang-up.
3. Moving further down we pass the people who we would if 1 or 2 things were different about them.
4. At the bottom are the people we would fuck drunk, and would lie about doing it later. I would rather say these are the people that are our friends and acquaintances. People, to say not so politely... really don't have a chance with us.
Now let's take a look at what the typical woman's ladder looks like:
The first thing to notice here is that a woman has not one ,but two ladders. This is because in addition the normal ladder, a woman also has a friends ladder. The friends ladder is where a woman puts guys that she considers "just friends". More to the point where she puts guys who don't get to have sex with her.
The problem arises because a woman never lets a guy know which ladder he is on. Obviously there is a huge difference, or gap between these two ladders. It is in this gap that kisses of death are delivered. All a man can do is "go for it" and make a move on a girl; ask her out, try to kiss her, write her a love note or whatever. If he's on the good ladder fine. If he is on the friends ladder this is a case of ladder jumping. The man is trying to jump the gap from the friends ladder to the real ladder. The girl has two choices at this point: she can let him on the ladder and all is well, or, more likely, she can kick him in the head, and off the ladder. If you look you'll see that below the ladder is the Abyss(what was it Nietzsche said about a man being on a rope stretched over an Abyss?....well it's worse than he thought; there is no rope.) So the man falls into the Abyss. The Abyss isn't really as bad as it sounds. Mostly it's a period of self-loathing, embarrassment, and of course utter awkwardness with the girl in question if they are talking at all.
To fully illustrate the point I'll now examine some common scenarios and their ladder theory explanations. For purposes of these examples Tom will be our boy and Jane will be out girl.
Scenario 1: Tom meets Jane. She's pretty and seems interesting to talk to. Tom and Jane start hanging out and talking more and more. Tom develops an attraction to Jane, and one day tries to kiss her. Jane tell Tom she doesn't think of him that way and she wants to remain friends. The next few weeks contact between the two falls off. Jane is now chasing a guy who has no interest in her at all.
Ladder Theory Explanation: Tom met Jane. Tom was immediately placed on the friends ladder. Tom didn't know this. Tom tried to jump ladders. Jane kicked Tom in the head rather than lead him on and sent him hurtling to the Abyss below. The new guy was NEVER was not on her friends ladder (they never are) but rather on her good ladder.
Scenario 2: Tom meets Jane. She's cute and seems smart. After an appropriate amount of time he asks her out on a date. She accepts and they have what seems to be a perfectly nice date. Tom thinks he has a chance with Jane. He asks her out again. She says no, either explicitly or by never returning his phone call. Tom has no idea what the Hell just happened. Jane gets back with her EX who is completely wrong for her but holds on to the relationship because she 'feels right' yet is entirely wrong for all the right reasons(puke).
Ladder Theory Explanation: Jane misrepresented which ladder Tom was on. He thought he was on the good ladder because of her acceptance of the date. Mistake. This led to an unintentional ladder jump. He was kicked into the Abyss. In this situation, Jane often wants to stay friends because you are so interesting and funny or some shit like that.
Scenario 3: A girl says any of the following to you:
* "You're like a brother to me"
* "You're like a big teddy bear"
* "I feel like I can talk to you about anything"
* "You're so nice"
* "Can you help me with my homework"
Ladder Theory Explanation: You are on the friends ladder. So Sorry.
You can see that a lot of problems can be avoided(though sadly not problem two) by declaring as soon as possible to a girl that you will not be friends under any circumstances. You can explain that she is too attractive or you can be blunt and say you don't want to bend your "friends" over a table and fuck them, but would rather play poker and go to the races with them, thus disqualifying her from friendship. As long as you are clear. OR you can say this and this has been come to be a philosophy of mine; I have enough friends to do stuff with. I have enough friends that I don't get spend enough time with and I'm always feeling guilty about. This may scare a girl away.
First and foremost. I will finish the Ladder Theory this weekend, promise.
www.rockthebells.net
I am so excited about this concert. All my favorite artists, the Wu and Rage, 2 groups I grew up on. VIP tickets, VIP parking, VIP meet and greets with the Artists, free giveaways, free food and drinks. Once in a lifetime!!!!
I can't believe I'm getting a chance to see Wu-Tang Clan and the Roots in the same night.
Now who do I take with me that will enjoy it as much as I will?????
And all thanks to George Wellinger for kissing my ass because he's dating my best friend. You da man georgieboy!!!
Those fresh, delicious summer salads that sustain life in sauna-like weather? They can do a lot more than keep you cool. In fact, five salad veggies turn out to be antioxidant superstars. Toss a handful into any bowl and you'll instantly up your defenses against everything from wrinkles to heart disease and even help make your RealAge younger. Then season some olive oil and vinegar with a few of the herbs and spices below and you'll punch up the antioxidant power even more. Health food doesn't get any easy-breezier!
5 Superstar Veggies
Artichokes
Radishes
Broccoli
Red chicory
Leeks
7 Stellar Seasonings
Sage
Rosemary
Marjoram
Thyme
Tarragon
Cumin
Fresh ginger
Garlic
The #1 Vegetable
Of the 27 vegetables scientists studied, the almighty artichoke led the antioxidant pack. Plus it's rich in both fiber and folate, two good-for-you nutrients. Look for plump but compact globe-like artichokes with thick, green, fresh-looking scales.
The Runners-Up
Radishes, broccoli, and even luscious leeks are stocked in most supermarkets. But what's red chicory? An Italian salad favorite with an oddly appealing bitter taste. Try mixing it with romaine.
The High-Powered Herbs and Spices
Sage, rosemary, and thyme...when Simon and Garfunkel made them famous, nobody knew they had disease-fighting powers. Cumin, a spice used heavily in Indian food, is even more impressive, as is ginger. But experiment: All of these seasonings are simple ways to boost the health -- and flavor -- of any salad (soups too). Here's a get-you-started recipe.
COOL-BEANS ARTICHOKE SALAD
This elegant mix is both light and filling -- perfect to serve a few friends on a sultry night.
Serves 4
10 baby artichokes, peeled and quartered
2 cups diagonally cut asparagus
1/3 cup thinly sliced radishes
3 green onions, thinly sliced
1 19-oz. can white beans, rinsed and drained
3 cloves garlic, minced
2 tsp. lemon juice
1 Tbsp. olive oil
1/4 tsp. salt
1/8 tsp. black pepper
8 large romaine leaves
1. Steam the artichokes for 8 minutes. Add the asparagus and steam about 2 minutes more, or until crisp-tender. Drain and run vegetables under cold water. Let cool.
2. Make dressing: Whisk together garlic, lemon juice, olive oil, salt, and pepper.
3. Combine radishes, onions, and beans in salad bowl with half of dressing and toss well. Gently stir in artichokes and asparagus.
4. To serve, place 2 romaine leaves each on four plates. Divide salad equally among plates and drizzle with remaining dressing.
I am the king of free t-shirts. This has been well established over the years. No one gets more free t-shirts than me. I'm given free shirts, I win free shirts, people buy them for me as gifts because they know I wear them and I value them. I was at Lucky Strike, a very posh, upscale bowling alley. This place is practically a club after 9pm. And they pretty much have a club dress code. I couldn't even get in with a soccer jersey that had a collar! So I told the guy how I had a free party that I had won a free game, blah blah blah. So the guy gave me a free shirt to wear. It's almost to a point where I have way too many shirts and I can't take any more. But it is inevitable.
I'll continue the Ladder Theory maybe tomorrow. I just had some random thoughts cross my mind today.
1. Sorries have a limit to them. One of my friends who's just a dumbass when it comes to life in general continues to apologize after he does foolish things. He always runs late, he always is just behind in life. Maybe I'm venting but sometimes you just want to shake someone and tell them, "get your act together, otherwise everyone is going to think you're a joke.'
2. We get comfortable in our lives and we think that we know people are thinking about us. We think we know what they saying about us. Well... we really don't know those things until you get blindsided by someone. And they tell you what others are thinking and others are DOING on your behalf. WHAT?!?! That's what you think on the inside but on the outside you're inquisitive and curious trying to not sound too eager to know. It is comforting to me that people care enough to do things behind my back. Sounds weird but I'm not that concerned about it.
3. I didn't realize it until earlier tonight but it's been a year since my then-girlfriend and I officially decided to do the long distance thing. Its crazy how I can remember some things so perfectly and I can forget important, daily things I shouldn't lose sight of. We talked from late night until early morning. It was nice thinking back...
4. If you haven't been following the whole Michael Vick saga. Let me summarize it. The guy was the most electrifying player the NFL has ever seen. Michael Jordan with a cannon for a left arm. The guy was the best running back in the NFL and he played quarterback!! He was my favorite football player. So now he is facing Federal Indictments for being a the ring leader of a dog fighting ring. It didn't take them long to indict him seeing how long it takes for them to indict.. oh I don't know, Barry Bonds, the Gambino crime family, etc... That definitely doesn't look good for him, the other part that spells disaster for him is how one of his Co-defendants pleaded guilty already. Uh Oh. I don't want to give out the details on all the atrocities that went on but I will deliver one thing because it ties into my last point of the evening. They electrocuted the dogs that lost or that didn't want to fight. They didn't do anything humanely even though they shouldn't be doing anything at all. Let them live. Why kill them? Why stick them in water and electrocute them?
Going with the logic that these a-holes used, since these dogs were electrocuted for not living up to their potential, doesn't that mean Michael Vick should have seen seen a toaster in the bathtub like 2 years ago? I know that was uncalled for, but damn Mike...
